Many are feeling a huge rift happening like a giant chasm splitting the earth in two.  This ‘separation’ is the disconnection we feel from others and the emptiness that weighs in our hearts.  There is an appearance of an US and THEM mentality of so many organised establishments.  Many of our institutions, which ironically is the name given to those who were incarcerated for being insane, are operating from a very base model that doesn’t allow for growth and freedom but rather control and stagnation.

Our education, legal and health system and many religious groups are still operating from an old out dated system that is keeping many confused, sick, disillusioned and struggling to maintain self worth.  None of these institutions are wrong; they are just too restrictive for growth and limit our divine capabilities.

When we are offered opportunities for a broader scope to view our life, as individuals we have the ability to seize it as a gift to ourselves or at the very least entertain the alternatives.

Many of us have been programmed with so many indoctrinated beliefs that the mere thought of change instils a fear in us that can feel life threatening.

We have new ideas presented to us every day about our food supplies and our emotions contributing to chronic illnesses, how pharmaceuticals can be more hazardous than helpful, and that we are more powerful and deserving than we could ever imagine.

So why is it that so many people refuse these ‘gifts’ only to remain stuck in their beliefs of the medical, pharmaceutical and fear based religious models?

Perhaps it is our light that is more fearful. Keep ourselves small and go with the masses. Perhaps that is why I have such a passion for the Indigos and their counterparts of autistic, and aspergers.  They are fearless and non conforming. How refreshing to see them be comfortable without any social masks.  Richard Branson quotes: You dont have to learn to walk by following rules. You learn by doing and falling over.

Whilst I am not encouraging anyone to adopt the traits of the radical warrior indigo, making a slight deviation off our current course may be the beginning of a new journey.

 For my own personal journey, I attempted to study traditional counselling and psychology but found it too restrictive, too many rules and not enough flexibility to address everyone as an individual.  We are not a one size fits all species. Wholistic counselling and psychology gave me the freedom to address clients as individuals.

It may seem like an oxymoron to speak of finding your individual authentic self when speaking of Oneness.  Some may have even been programmed to believe that working on ourselves is selfish, but I believe in finding our unique gift and individuality is to become whole which reconnects us back to the Oneness.

The three links are all related articles from Angelwhisperer website

Hope, destiny, miracles, trust and faith, are they just pretty buzz words or do they hold the key to elusive happiness that we are all striving for?

I just saw the movie, A Winter’s Tale and the message was very clear. It’s our belief in hope, destiny and miracles that will pull us out of every human patterning we have imprisoned ourselves with.

Not by being apathetic or passive but by trusting that if we only take action when it is guided by love not fear, then we will naturally fall into the order of our Grand design.  The movie has its theme of good versus evil for the Hollywood effect but the only evil that most of us have endured in our everyday lives is ourselves. 

Our perceptions, perspectives and assumptions that are more than likely giving us false information based on our past conditioning.

Our minds can over analyse and give us many scenarios that are often fear based.  Every bit of information we have ever absorbed, whether it be through media, society, books, family and friends is all catalogued in our brains, much like a google search.  If we are willing to make decisions based on our feelings, rather than our thoughts, we have a better option for a personalised solution to our current situation.  After all, our hearts are exclusive to us, hence why I call this HEART GOOGLE.  A simple test would be to question our decisions as to whether they are coming from a place of fear, confirming that we are coming from our head space instead of our heart space.

We have all had experiences that condition us not to trust and have faith or even trust ourselves.  We can often blame our hearts for getting us into relationships where we were hurt, betrayed or abused.  But if we are truthful with ourselves we will probably conclude that the decisions we made that brought us to this situation were not feeling decisions but rather fear based ones.  The fear of being alone is a classic example.

There is an abundance of wonderful things in the world if we would only be willing to switch channels to experience it.

Movies like A Winter’s Tale will inspire and warm, but more importantly it will grow the heart big enough to ‘feel’ the messages and renew our faith in why we are here.

I love the saying, ‘It’s not how many breaths we take, but how many moments took our breath away’. This movie delivered that and more, so much so that I wanted to see it again.

Keep the hope that our destiny does involve a miracle because when we believe we see miracles around us everyday.

We’re all familiar  with the terminology of ‘gifts in very strange wrapping paper’, but what does this actually mean?

All of us at some stage, and for some, there may seem a never ending procession of people in our lives that seemingly have made us miserable.

When you think of that person it can sometimes be difficult to think of them as a teacher or worse yet, a bearer of gifts.  More likely, at best, you would like to pretend they didn’t exist and at worst, wish they actually didn’t exist.

Before you race off to confession it’s important to realise that even highly evolved people will experience these feelings at some stage.  Knowing that it is just a stage and not a life sentence is the essence of how to move through the levels of healing.

We have all been told the secret to happiness is forgiveness and whilst that is an intrical part of healing, I believe that to truly experience deeper understanding we have to be thankful and grateful for the teacher and only then are we truly experiencing our soul’s evolvement.

People come into our lives to teach us about us. They will project and mirror old wounds that we believe we have carefully camouflaged. Our attempts at camouflaging show up as addictions in all its forms.  Any form of addiction is a block of our souls light and when deprived of its light our hearts ache.

Once our triggers have been set off, the secret is to not get caught up in the drama of the incident and see if there is any truth in their words or any part of their behaviour that is secretly part of our shadow self.

Our inauthenticity makes a hole in our soul that is constantly searching for its wholeness.

So the question remains if someone is pushing a button in us then it is our responsibility to own it and face it.  Not deflect, retreat, sulk or attack.  An analogy I like to use is that if we had an open wound on our body and someone poked at it, we would understandably recoil from the pain and resent the perpetrator.  This happens with emotional wounds in much the same way, someone can push an old open wound but they are not responsible for it, just for bringing its existence to the surface.

The purpose of love relationships is to elevate our spiritual growth.  A mere acquaintance does not have the same impact because they don’t have access to our hearts, where all our answers reside.

In the early stages of a new relationship attraction and common interests are high thus making our protective walls and vulnerabilities less imposing.  Once those guards are down the real healing can occur.  Only someone who has access to our hearts has the capabilities to unlock the door on our past hurts so they can be addressed.

This realisation is rarely seen when we are in the eye of the storm.  It is easier to project our pain and disappointment back at the person we believe inflicted it.

When we can see ourselves as the common denominator in many of our dramatic scenes we will come to realise that the scripts are similar, only the cast members have changed, and then true freedom can occur.

In acknowledging that every situation has a bigger picture and be open to finding a purpose for our situation, we will eventually find THE GIFT.

 

 

 I was recently in a bookshop and was drawn to a book called Archetypes by Caroline Myss .  I intuitively opened the book asking that it fall on the exact page that I most needed to read.  The page opened to the chapter called Caregiver.  It was interesting to know that although this archetype has a nurturing and caring disposition, there was a real danger of becoming an enabler and also becoming a crusader to ‘fix’ everything and everyone.

The trap could be that many ‘caregiver‘ archetypes are, not surprisingly, in roles of teaching, healing, nursing, or counselling and could suffer severe burnout if they are not able to balance or understand when this role has become an overwhelm, or it has become an addictive payoff.

Many times as a mother I am sure I donned the Supermum attire and took on every household members chores, emotions, tantrums and tears, only to find myself  being anything but a superhero and more like Linda Blair’s character in The Exorcist’ complete with head spinning and frothing at the mouth.

Sounding a little familiar? So what drives people to become martyrs or people pleasers only to resent those very same people or acts down the track?

There are probably a few reasons ranging from the need to control our environment, or the need to be needed, or by helping others is a convenient avoidance strategy to our own issues, or just looking for the recognition or accolade of a job well done that invariably often doesn’t even eventuate.

Whilst all those reasons above could be feasible often for a lot of people,  I believe the inability to receive graciously, whether it be a compliment, gift or kind deed is the real culprit.

I think for many of us we have been conditioned to believe we had to earn everything including love, so we may be acquiring it passively through our nurturing and good deeds.

When I was studying my tutor said that when we deprive someone of the opportunity to give, then we are being selfish and are taking all the warm and fuzzies associated with giving, for ourselves. Well wouldn’t that comment just throw a people pleaser into a tailspin??

Before it can become a natural acceptance though there may be a few probing questions that we need to be very honest about to find our true motivators.  Understanding your motives is key to finding a balance of giving and receiving in our lives.

The rest becomes the willingness to change thoughts and beliefs and learning to just say thank you. Can’t be that hard can it ?

Might make this my new mantra

Resisting receiving reaps regret

 

In October 2012 I received a traffic infringement which I opted to be prosecuted for as I believed the notice was excessive and the circumstances trivial.  Then two weeks ago I received a court summons, so my first theory of standing on principle would be met with Universal rewards suddenly went out the window.

Not that easily disillusioned, my next plan of attack was to have my day in court and share my opinions on the matter, this time without any expectation that I would be exonerated of the financial encumbrances.

I was informed prior to today’s court appearance that traffic infringements are often looked at from a black and white viewpoint.
Even with that in mind I was even more determined that it was important to point out that everything in life was not black and white and not everything can be pigeon holed or apply a blanket cover.

My objective was to state the facts of why I believed the fine was unjust but also manage to slip in my stance on not treating people as collective, non-thinking clones, incapable of making rational judgements.

I was the first case off the rank in a room of my fellow peers who also had come to plead their individual cases.  I was offered to speak, (didn’t have to tell me twice), so I set about putting across why I chose not to pay the fine initially and what I believed the alternative choices the police officer could have made. So far, no one has given me a glaring look and the court stenographer is still madly typing so I proceeded into the next section of my speech about why I felt that people need to have passion and integrity and stand up for their beliefs.

I pointed out maybe if more people had the confidence to stand up for what they believe in, even being in a minority, that there wouldn’t be an epidemic of people with a lack of sense of self.

I also stated that I wasn’t trying to make anyone or any institution wrong, but just to make my beliefs right for me. While I was on a roll I also slipped in that there is a difference for not having respect for the law and not having respect for oneself.  I must admit I didn’t think I would get that much air time.

The judge seemed ever so slightly impressed with what he called my ‘heartfelt’ speech but not enough to waive the fine.  My consolation prize was no court fees were added to the initial fine.  However, the real prize for me was the opportunity to go on record and stand up for my principles.  I’d say that was a win.

Ironically this is my first blog and today is my birthday so it seems fitting to celebrate just being on the anniversary of when that was all we were capable of.

As I walk on the beach and listen to the waves, watching how the clouds continually take different shapes, I realise how easy it is to take everything for granted in pursuit of an identity.

Like others, I had brought my headphones and a determination of a fast paced exercise regimen, until I realised I wanted to listen to the waves and greet people and just absorb all the surroundings.

Considering my background in wholistic psychology I have often pondered over the mindset of the workaholics, the gym junkies and the overachievers.  What makes so many humans push themselves so hard?  For what?  What is that elusive prize that so many are reaching for?

How did we get to define ourselves by so many external stimuli whether they be physical or emotional?

Why do we work in jobs that we hate, just to finance cars and houses, especially when so many just look forward to relaxing on a beach or river in very modest dwellings.

Why do we define ourselves by whether we are in a relationship or not just to lose ourselves in the process?

Why do we feel the need to escape our lives by not being present in the now?  All these questions are real for many people.  Maybe if our lives were simpler and our expectations were kinder of ourselves the ratio of our bliss time would reverse.

I guess the question that came to mind was:  How do we measure success?  Everyone’s answer may differ but health and happiness I would assume would have to rate fairly high, and yet we sacrifice so often both of these in a false perception of what success is.

The overall message that came through was when we are truly in touch with our feelings and tell ourselves the truth our tastes and lifestyles may be a lot simpler and less stressful than they need to be.

I will continue to enjoy just being, because the more I give myself permission to do what I love, the closer I am to real love.  It all starts with me.