We’re all familiar with the terminology of ‘gifts in very strange wrapping paper’, but what does this actually mean?
All of us at some stage, and for some, there may seem a never ending procession of people in our lives that seemingly have made us miserable.
When you think of that person it can sometimes be difficult to think of them as a teacher or worse yet, a bearer of gifts. More likely, at best, you would like to pretend they didn’t exist and at worst, wish they actually didn’t exist.
Before you race off to confession it’s important to realise that even highly evolved people will experience these feelings at some stage. Knowing that it is just a stage and not a life sentence is the essence of how to move through the levels of healing.
We have all been told the secret to happiness is forgiveness and whilst that is an intrical part of healing, I believe that to truly experience deeper understanding we have to be thankful and grateful for the teacher and only then are we truly experiencing our soul’s evolvement.
People come into our lives to teach us about us. They will project and mirror old wounds that we believe we have carefully camouflaged. Our attempts at camouflaging show up as addictions in all its forms. Any form of addiction is a block of our souls light and when deprived of its light our hearts ache.
Once our triggers have been set off, the secret is to not get caught up in the drama of the incident and see if there is any truth in their words or any part of their behaviour that is secretly part of our shadow self.
Our inauthenticity makes a hole in our soul that is constantly searching for its wholeness.
So the question remains if someone is pushing a button in us then it is our responsibility to own it and face it. Not deflect, retreat, sulk or attack. An analogy I like to use is that if we had an open wound on our body and someone poked at it, we would understandably recoil from the pain and resent the perpetrator. This happens with emotional wounds in much the same way, someone can push an old open wound but they are not responsible for it, just for bringing its existence to the surface.
The purpose of love relationships is to elevate our spiritual growth. A mere acquaintance does not have the same impact because they don’t have access to our hearts, where all our answers reside.
In the early stages of a new relationship attraction and common interests are high thus making our protective walls and vulnerabilities less imposing. Once those guards are down the real healing can occur. Only someone who has access to our hearts has the capabilities to unlock the door on our past hurts so they can be addressed.
This realisation is rarely seen when we are in the eye of the storm. It is easier to project our pain and disappointment back at the person we believe inflicted it.
When we can see ourselves as the common denominator in many of our dramatic scenes we will come to realise that the scripts are similar, only the cast members have changed, and then true freedom can occur.
In acknowledging that every situation has a bigger picture and be open to finding a purpose for our situation, we will eventually find THE GIFT.