Yesterday was the third anniversary of the passing of my ex husband and father of my two children.
Whilst I try to make a practice of remembering his life with all the positives, rather than concentrating on the loss, it still can trigger off some elements of sadness, especially for my children, and as any parent will attest to, seeing your children in pain is heartbreaking.
Through all the messages and tributes, including a reposting of a slideshow tribute on social media that my sister in law had created, the message hit home of what he had left behind as his legacy, all the while Elvis Presley’s “My Way” was playing in the background.
That legacy was to live life to the fullest, live without fear and seize the day. So even though I can feel sad for all the special moments in my children’s life where his absence will be felt, I can take comfort in the knowledge that his life philosophy will live on in our children.
As parents we probably excel at protecting and nurturing more than we encourage them to embrace their uniqueness, risk taking and leaps of faith.
Imagine how different our lives would look if we lived fearlessly in all areas. So many of us live our lives in the bubble of our comfort zone. How far could we go if we didn’t fear failure, rejection, embarrassment or the need for approval?
Every day we are offered opportunities in our life. I believe the difference between successful, happy people are those who seize those opportunities without letting fear inhabit their minds and bodies literally crippling us.
No one can predict when this life may end, so to not live a life with regret maybe we should adopt our own philosophy of the three ‘F’s. Live Fearlessly, Forgive and have Fun. I heard Robert Holden speak at a Hay House conference a couple of years ago and he said, ‘Not your purpose to arrive safely at your own funeral – Live Now, Procrastinate Later’
FEAR is an acronym for False Evidence Appearing Real
Having the courage to face our fears doesn’t necessarily constitute bunging jumping or skydiving. Perhaps it might be to have that hard conversation that we have been avoiding with a friend, family member or work colleague. It might be having the courage to leave a job and follow our heart, or leave a relationship that we know is over.
Mend that rift, be a hero, don’t put off telling people we love them or we’re sorry. Live with no regrets because tomorrow is not guaranteed, today is all we have.
Maybe our mission is to leave our mark on this world not for how ‘safe’ we played the game of life, but instead of how brave we were, to dare to just be US.
Don’t be afraid your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin
Life does challenge us and at times it can be very overwhelming but when we challenge those fears the universe gives us hope and for anyone experiencing grief and loss it can seem the pain never subsides. (please see article via link)
If you still need further encouragement then please take a moment to listen to the words of “My Way” and adopt your own philosophy on life that is right for you.
In closing I want to share with you the poem I wrote yesterday
The day looms again that fills most with a dread
But it’s the jokes, the laughter, and the memories
I’ll choose instead
If I feel that you’re gone and it makes me blue
I look at our children and know that’s not true
From antics, pulled faces to drive and ambition
The pieces of you always rise to fruition
When I look up and find the brightest star
It reminds me to smile
Cos you’re never too far
Always in our hearts
RIP Mick Kemp 10.6.55 – 8.4.11